Oops… We Got You! Don’t Be a Dummy and Hide Your Money There!

Hide money

Everybody Loves Cash!

Do you remember how excited you were as a child when you received money from family members on the holidays? You’d hide your money in a secret spot, and you knew it would be safe from anyone who would come into your room. I always kept my secret stash in one of those wind-up alarm clocks. The back came off, and it was a perfect place to hide my money. Now that I’m older and wiser, I now realize that that wasn’t such a great place to hide my money. I would have been devastated if the house caught on fire or if my mom cleaned out my room and thrown away my clock. Devastated!

Well, my clock isn’t the worst place you can hide your money. Oh lord no! There are some crazy places people have been known to hide their money — be it lottery winnings or just their rainy day savings. You’ll be a little surprised at some of the places people stash their cash.

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1. Stashing it in Clothing

Hiding money in clothing
It’s always a good day when you stick your hand in a pocket and pull out $20. Some people take this happy coincidence, one step further and stash rolls of money in shoes they never wear, coat pockets, shoe boxes, or in purses that they never use. This may sound like a good idea, but what if your spouse decides to go through the closet and donate items to make room for new clothing? Imagine the surprise of whoever receives your donated clothing—pockets full of money! Now that would be a wonderful gift!

Hiding money in cookie jar
When I was growing up, my grandfather would always give me coffee jars or cans full of loose change and bills for Christmas. He would spend all year filling up the jar, and it was always so heavy when I got it. It was a great treat to dump it out on the floor and count my gift. Coffee cans, random boxes of cereal, cookie jars, and other hiding spots in the kitchen may sound like a good idea to hide your money. I mean, it’s safe in your own home. You know where it is, and you can see the hiding spot. What happens if your house burns down? Or if someone eats the last bit of cereal and throws away that box with some of your money in it? You can see where I’m going right?

3. Stuffed Animals or Kids’ Toys

Hiding money in toys
There once was a reformed burglar who urged people to hide their valuables in their children’s toys or stuffed animals. In theory, it may sound like a good idea. If someone were to come into your home and rob you, they wouldn’t think to go into a child’s room and start ripping the heads off of teddy bears hoping to find the money. My complaint against this notion is… Do you want to trust your kids with your money—albeit if they don’t even know it’s in there? Kids are rough with their toys; they lose them, they tear them to shreds sometimes… Flush them down the toilet or let the dogs get a hold of them. It just isn’t a good idea to put your money into toys.

4. Feminine Hygiene Products

Hiding money in feminine hygiene products
Ladies, you may think that keeping a rainy-day stash in your tampon boxes or your maxi-pad packages is a good idea, especially if you have a man in your house. Most men wouldn’t go into these things. For some strange reason, feminine hygiene products scare the crap out of men. While it may deter the men in your life, if you have a female guest over and she needs a tampon or a pad, you may forget that you stashed your money in the boxes. Imagine your guest’s surprise when they reach in for a tampon, and pull out a roll of money instead!

5. Bury the Money in the Yard

Hiding money in the yard
Don’t take lessons from pirates and bury your money in the ground. Time passes, and even if X does mark the spot, you could lose your map, forget where the money is buried, or even move away. What would happen if you died and your family finds your map? They would think you’re crazy and believe in nonsensical things like buried treasure. Sure every little kid wants to think the buried treasure is real, but as grown adults, if we ever come across a map with a big red X on it… We usually brush it off. You don’t want your treasure to meet that same fate!

These are just some of the dumbest places people have hidden their money. There are many, many more crazy places. People get creative when it comes to keeping their money hidden. Some other notable places include: under the mattress (classic), in an envelope hidden in a piece of furniture or a back of a painting, fake pipes, and in the holes of cinder blocks. People get creative. Don’t be a dummy and hide your money where things could go wrong. Be smart and hire a financial advisor. They’ll be able to help you invest your money and put it somewhere safe.

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